A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, the “Star Wars” characters would have made for an interesting movie about meetings. Since no Force is strong enough to make that happen, we’ll imagine how it would have played out in real life. Because “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” doesn’t open until later this week, we can’t predict where the new stars fit in. But in sticking with the film’s marketing style of ignoring the prequels, we relied on a few original favorites (with one exception) for creating this exotic meetings entourage.
Luke Skywalker: Keynote Speaker
Who’s going to draw a bigger crowd than the guy who turned Darth Vader back from the dark side? Luke’s rise from a mere farmer on Tatooine to a galactic hero is the stuff attendees really eat up.
Darth Vader: Third-Party Negotiator
Let’s just say few have a way to change minds like Darth did. Intimidation without physical confrontation is exactly what organizations need to get the rates they are looking for. He is clearly willing to do the dirty work, as he did for the emperor.
Princess Leia: Planner
No one takes charge quite like Princess Leia. Heck, she even took orders while captive on the Death Star. Her take-no-prisoners attitude perfectly mirrors how the most successful planners operate in the field.
Han Solo: Attendee
For all his charm and smooth moves, Han Solo is not one to be left in charge of a major operation. But the rogue pilot would be a master networker and a rock star during off-site events like target practice and card games (remember, that’s how he won the Millennium Falcon from Lando Calrissian).
Lando Calrissian: CVB Chief
Speaking of Calrissian, the owner and operator of Cloud City knows how to wine and dine people (presumably with Colt 45s). His ability to work both sides is just what CVBs need to strike deals between planners and venues to bring events to town. Plus, the guy wears a cape—how cool is that?
As any “Star Wars” fan knows, these two are a package deal. R2-D2 is the droid for the AV job: It stores all the data you need, can play hologram-led videos and is top-notch at repair work (remember R2 fixed the Millennium Falcon’s hyperdrive in “The Empire Strikes Back”). Meanwhile, C-3PO is fluent in 6 million forms of communication (heck, he even told stories Ewoks could understand!), so it’s safe to say the golden domer can serve a diverse crowd’s needs.
Emperor Palpatine: Hotel CEO
You don’t have to be evil to run a major corporation, but often you do need to yield influence from a backroom. Being the Phantom Menace and all, the emperor sure seems to fit the bill.
Who’s going to mess with Chewie? Nobody. ’Nuff said.
Everyone in the industry needs a mentor. Yoda has 900 years’ worth of experience to draw upon. Plus, he’s picky about his pupils, meaning he’ll give you full attention whenever you need it.
Jar Jar Binks: Suitcaser
He’s the guy who shows up and nobody wants him there—like on this list. He really doesn’t belong, but we’d be remiss not to include Jar Jar.